A pair of losers working at department store plan to rob the place after it closes. When a bunch of kids show up begging for a story, the men launch into an improvised version of Aladdin.
You know the Aladdin story but not this version. Back in 2015, this want-to-be comic movie was released to unsuspecting audiences across France and possibly other parts of Europe. The movie, starting Kev Adams (apparently quite popular with the ladies in his native country France), is coming to America on Video On Demand. You might think to yourself, “Hey it’s an Aladdin movie, I will watch it with my kids,” do not do this. If you need a reason, beyond most of the humor is far above their understanding and still not funny, how about avoiding the movie because one of the characters gets nicknamed floppy-dick for not sleeping with the princess. Speaking of the princess, her name is not Jasmine as expected, but Shallia. I know a name change is a minor transgression, seriously though, Jasmine is the dream and writer Daive Cohen stepped over the bounds when he changed the name. The backdrop (which cost a whopping $17 million dollars) was an ascetically pleasant land of wonders, which is why I gave the movie one star.
Losers Sam (Kev Adams) and Khallid (William Lebghil) are planning to rob the department store where they play Santa once the mall clears out. Unfortunately, some children wanting Mr. Clause to enchant them with a story, muddle their plans. For whatever reason, Sam chooses to regale the children with his version of Aladdin which magically mirrors his life. Now to Bagdad for the beautiful backdrop with towering palaces, dusty streets, and markets full of wonder. Sam becomes Aladdin, who is tricked into a cave to find a lamp. First, of course, he has seen the princess, and they fell in love instantly. He finds the lamp but the magician tries to take it, and Aladdin has to use his persuasive bartering skills with the genie for extra wishes. He uses those wishes to find his way back to the palace to win Shallia’s hand in marriage (still annoyed her name is not Jasmine). Meanwhile, Khallid gets pulled into the palace drama as a potential suitor for the princess. The evil Vizir (not named Jafar) uses Khallid as his fake nephew to gain the kingdom in hopes the king will soon die after the marriage takes place. Both Aladdin and Khallid have troubles along the way as the fight their nemesis Vizir for the Princess.
I am sure there is more to the plot, and I did try to pay attention, but ninety-nine percent of the jokes failed. Slapstick, to strange dancing, to lewd jokes, none of the humor was effective. There seemed to be an odd mix of Bollywood, meets French, badly made-for-TV movie, and a few other ineffective movie techniques, which of course finished with a happy ending but failed to create a happy audience. Maybe these jokes worked well for French audiences, and could potentially work for slackers in pot-approved states needing a movie to watch with a bag of Cheetos. The target audience, besides the latter best guess, is up in the air; neither amusing for children nor adults, maybe the teenagers in the middle will be enthralled with the beautiful princess and the attempts to add pops of technology to the plot set hundreds of years ago. “The New Adventures of Aladdin” should have stayed in Paris with Kev Adams’ large fan base, where they can enjoy tiresome antics and busy blundering jokes Americans will undoubtedly lose interest in quickly.
Available on Video On Demand Tuesday, May 16th